Saturday, September 27, 2003

Soccer day!! Had the boys soccer games out of town today. We loaded up the car early this morning and took off. It was so fun to watch them play. This is our 6year olds second year to play, so he is still just getting the hang of it! How fun to cheer them on and laugh at the occasional "No, not that goal, the other one is yours!!". Hilarious! Our oldest, 9yo, is really into the game now and knows all the rules, so it is a much more structured team. Very exciting to watch and suspenseful!!

Afterwards we got some lunch (Mexican food of and then went to do some shopping. We went into Lowes to look at bathtubs and such, as we are planning to expand our house a bit to accommodate another little person! I dread the construction work, but look forward to my own bathroom where I don't have to constantly flip the seat back down!!!

I have been thinking lately about what it will be like with 4 kids. Will I be a good mother to that many? I know that it will be fine, but it is interesting to think about. Some friends can't understand why we want another baby. "4 KIDS!!! That's crazy" It is hard for me to explain what children mean to me. My favorite poem says it very well:


Some would gather money
Along the path of life
Some would gather roses
And rest from worldly strife

But I would gather children
From among the thorns of sin
I would seek a little child
With a big and toothless grin

For money cannot enter
In the land of endless days
And roses that are gathered
Soon wilt along the way

But, oh, the laughing children
As I cross the sunset sea
And the gates swing wide to heaven
I can take them in with me.

author unknown

They remain. They are what is real and good and true. They are living proof of God, and his blessings. When I have a child inside me, I am experiencing Gods real presence in this world.....the Hand of God.

While writing this, I recall the last 18 months, and how hard I fought to be in control. All that wasted energy. I tried to MAKE it happen on my time. I had to be in control. Toward the end of all the struggles, I was reminded of two scripture verses in Isaiah:

Isaiah 29:16:

"You turn things upside down,
as if the potter were thought to be like the clay!
Shall what is formed say to him who formed it,
"He did not make me"?
Can the pot say of the potter
"He knows nothing"?"

Isaiah 64:8:

"Yet, O Lord, you are our Father.
We are the clay, you are the potter;
we are all the work of your Hand".


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